If I launch a short survey „who likes to be refused”, “most of you would not confirm this question. To be refused – either in the job, from your partner, in a dance hall, or by a customer, is never nice. It is painful, weakens the ego, low down your mood, your motivation, and robs your energy for more challenges.
But only, if you allow the refusal to do that!
What is a refusal? An offer that is not accepted. The reason could be with you, the „product, “ or the person who refuses it. This is no rocket science. Here are some proven ways to overcome them and don`t let them hit you.
1. The reason for it is you:
Find out why it is you. Is it a thing you want or can change to get accepted? If yes – do it. If not – accept it and look for somebody else who will take you, as you are. My personal shifting strategy is about changing 20% to 30% of my core personality if the customer/person is worth it. Only for this time and not to change my core. If you meet the customer or contact regularly, you must repeat this shift, or offer him slightly change of you to 15%, 10%, and so on, until it is the real you.
2. The reason is the product:
Change it, or change the „customer. “ Or explain the worth of the product to the customer. Listen to where the customer sees the problems with the product and clear the issues. If the customer still does not accept, find other customers in different markets or locations who fit better. Or change the product as long as your dream customer loves it and can`t wait to buy it.
3. The customer is the problem:
He has a bad day, left a stressful and negative meeting, has trouble with his partner or children, is unbalanced, tired, full of sorrow or fear, has some general personal or professional trouble – and that`s when you meet him. He will not be the best version of himself. And you might think, the problem is you. What you are not.
According to my professional experience (about 2-6 hours of sales a day, since many years – primarily cold calls ): a) the customer reflects your mood and b) in 95% of the other refusals, you are not the main reason.
This means: don`t take it too personal. Cool down, get calm, accept the blow, but don`t let him knock you down for the day or week. One of my favorite sales trainers told me many years ago that selling is a numbers game. There is nobody out there who sells everything to everyone, every time and long term. We all have our ups and downs, and refusals are an incremental part of the sales business.
Take it easy; learn from the refusals. And then: talk to the next customer.
Have fun in sales
Peter Wolf
